There is a principle in legal practice, law of torts specifically, that states, paraphrased for literary purposes, that it does not matter how you find your victim(s), you have to take them like that. With regards to damages, compensation and even death. Which catapults it from a civil case to a criminal case.
If it was engendered by your negligence or by a wrongful action of yours, you have no one else to blame. The buck stops at your door. To read more on this, see here and if the legalese is too much for you, see here instead. But many do not realize that it has ties to the mind as well.
Sticks and stones may break my bones
But words can never hurt me nyen nyen nyen 🙄.
You say? Words are literally the most hurtful things. A sharp word, hateful, hurtful words, how do you feel afterwards?
I was listening to a pastor (Pastor Mike Obaro, Glory 2 Glory Parish, RCCG) and he mentioned that words are the only spiritual currency that we can tender. And our words speak either life or death.
If out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks, then our mouths and our words reveal more about us than we can think. (Read As A Man Thinketh by James Allen. Amazing book 👍🏽)
The reason I write this, is due to a variety of factors.
1. I had a bad day mentally a short period ago. Information overload. “Friendship” overload. You can never have too many friends. Actually, you can. If you’re being influenced by more people than you ought to be influenced by, you’ll notice your head telling you, I have reached my capacity, through a variety of factors, a headache, a migraine, loss of communication with the Father, the Holy Spirit etc etc. Too many cooks spoil the broth. Too many friends cause confusion.
Social media overload is a very real problem to quite a lot of people. I like the drama, the likes, the follows quite alright, but I can leave my phone back at my house and go to work and return to it in the evening. Or just switch off my phone all day. Unfortunately, I love my music playlists too much. Looking at buying a new mini music player independent of my phone. Or someone could just send me one. 🤷🏽
2. I had a one sided conversation with someone I fondly called Annoying Person Number One because God had led me to notice that he’d stopped reading my Whatsapp statuses and he brought back the memories of a time when he truly was kind to me. At a certain point in time, he was exactly what I prayed about. And I owed that memory of him an apology.
3.. I have taken it upon myself to reconnect with every member of my family. Through video calls, texts, chats etc. I need and love my family. And I need to let everyone of them know that I need them and I love them. And that in this world, someone needs, loves and admires them. I’m hoping that connection will inspire connection and we will grow even closer than we currently are. And what’s that popular slang again? 🤔.
The one that smelt it dealt it
I believe that it has alternate applications. The one it was revealed to has a responsibility to.
Let me illustrate with a story. Once when I was fighting with God, exam period, University days I had an argument with one of my closest friends, Ife over a textbook or a notebook. I don’t remember the cause of the fight, I just know it was over a book.
And I hadn’t heard God speak to me in a while. But He spoke that day. He nudged me, told me to go and apologize to my friend because I was wrong. And I went, and she apologized to me too. Because she said, it’s not possible for two people to be angry at the same time and still save their relationship without one apologizing first. If I had not obeyed the leading of God, or if I had delayed unduly, I’m quite sure that the relationship would not be as close as it currently is today.
Another illustration, I have a propensity towards swollen eyes and knowing this and I know that a simple way to halt/reverse the process is simply to lay something very cold against my eye.
Would it not be extremely stupid of me then to neglect my knowledge and instead blame my situation, circumstances or even God for giving me eyes that swell up. 🤷🏽
With knowledge comes a responsibility to apply that knowledge.
That is wisdom. And wisdom is profitable to direct.
Regarding REALIZATION number one, the very simple solution God showed me, was to download a To Do list from Google Play Store and pour out everything crowding my mind onto it.
Regarding realization number (2), as much as I really don’t mind that he has stopped reading my Whatsapp statuses, and I’m not going to stalk him, what motivated me to apologize to him were memories of times when I did the exact same thing he did to other people. I mean, why did so much drama/demons come out of me at exam time except if the sole reason it came was to destroy the focus of all my colleagues, classmates, friends?
I see that he is still friendly with the people who came out of it with knowledge but not outwardly expressed hurt. Good for him. Thumbs up 👍🏽. To him and them. I’m a very big fan of having friends in the workplace.
But I am very sensitive and you will NOT lay your shit on me without consequences, no matter what form it may come as. Freeze out, very long and loud yelling, extreme annoyance forever afterwards. I consign myself to the first mostly. The deep freeze. But there is another way, a better way.
Regarding that relationship, I’ve apologized, it was revealed to me that I was wrong so I took the responsibility of going to apologize. But that apology gave me a freedom, from what I thought, from painful memories, from a binding to someone I was never meant to be bound to. And I’m free. Whatever he does now, does not concern me. All emotional ties have been broken. Hallelujah, Our God reigns… Hands lifted up, eyes closed, head bowed 😝💕
Regarding realization number three, I ask nothing but your prayers.
Have a great day!
I wish all of you, warm hugs, full pockets and lots of laughter.
Peace out! *mic drop*