Happy Thursday Week 15

ONE
In my new church, something I wholly admire are the welfare programs they regularly hold. From clothes, to education and food, everything is covered by the welfare department. And every once in a while, we have the health challenges of a member brought to the attention of the church for contributions to be made if for instance the person cannot afford the cost.
Last week Sunday, in the church, the case of someone who’d been involved in an accident where his kidneys and bladder were affected was brought to the attention of the congregation.They’d fundraised for him before but ongoing medical and miscellaneous costs had halved the money. A spot had been found for him to have surgery but they needed N600,000.00 in addition to the half left, to pay the doctor who was to perform the surgery.
Donation boxes were about to be passed. But while I was debating with myself as to how much to donate, someone donated all of it. All N600,000.00 (Six Hundred Thousand naira (only!) of it.
To be honest, I was happy and so relieved as well. My mind attaches to the oddest things, and I know, that if the donation had run for about 2 weeks, I might have done something I’d regret later, like given away all my savings again. But lucky for all parties, I didn’t have to. Just say a prayer for that person, please. It was such an uplifted moment in the church when his/her donation was announced.May God bless you whomever and wherever you are. May He cause His face to shine upon you and heal you and give you peace.

TWO

Last week Friday was the 22nd anniversary of my first birthday. That’s my over complicated way of saying I turned 23.

 No you can’t have any cake, I ate it all. But if I see any comments asking for *cake, be rest assured that I will ask for my birthday present in return. Quid pro quo, nay?

I didn’t post the birthday list thing like I did last year, because I realized at the #Blassion event, that I really don’t like people knowing all that much about me when I don’t know all that much about them. So, peace out. If inclined, please leave a birthday blessing for me in the comments. Thank you.

*Cake- Not excluding food, drinks, ice cream, all the lacha lacha associated with birthdays. It was last week. It’s been eaten, digested and err…

THREE

Story story….

So, I love eating abacha. Mad love it. It ranks among my top fave foods in fact. But after one super disastrous attempt making abacha for myself some years back, I started buying it. 

My dad would tell me on the regs, “Uju, buy this thing and make it at home. You can’t trust the process of the cooking of food vendors” and I’ll be like “It’s not like anyone has died from eating abacha outside. Even if I purge, maximum 2 days, and I’ll be a-ok.” (Not quite so specific but, you get the gist).

Until 5 people died from eating abacha. As it happens, I was in the car with my dad when they announced a cholera outbreak had killed 5 human beings. 5! All of whom had eaten abacha. 

I thank God my stupid pride did not cause my name to appear in the list of dead people. Thank God for me if you would, please?

Also, is anyone willing to make me a large container of abacha? I saw one woman selling some on my way to court yesterday and but for God…

FOUR
So one dude called me yesterday. He knew I was a lawyer. He asked if my “lawyering” extended to supply contracts. 

Sure, I replied and then he started giving me some very detailed instructions. Now, I was at the Ministry of Lands when I got that call and while I could hear him, I couldn’t be sure I’d remember, so I asked him to please send a text explaining exactly what he wanted me to do. 

He sent the text, giving me the number of someone to inquire about something from. 

Now, major red flags:

1. He said he knew me. I did not know HIM.

2. Why can’t you inquire about something by yourself? This was not something only a lawyer could ask. It was a basic transaction. Buyer and seller. What is my business?

3. What is my business? I make sure not to assume the worst about people right off the bat because that won’t get me far. But come on! I may be slow, but I’m certainly not stupid. You ask me to represent you, tell me someone will call me to give me money, you need me to inquire about something for you, something you can inquire for yourself. And I felt weird.

So I reverted to the lawyering failsafe; if you want me to represent you, you and I need to draft a contract which you will sign (I’d have insisted on seeing some identification as well), authorizing me to act on your behalf for a set fee. 

If I’d had any doubts that I was persecuting an innocent man, they ended when he swiftly said that he and I couldn’t do business if that was the prerequisite. 

Money is great, honestly. But I’m not about to entangle myself in something illegal or get scammed cos I don’t have patience. No. Everything good will come. At the right time. And it won’t make me feel weird. 

And to buttress my rationalizations, I got another, above board opportunity that same afternoon. 

Yay God!

FIVE

Although NYSC is not over for me as yet, I’m leaving my boss tomorrow!

I’m not going to go into details (yet), but I will tell you that I am so excited to be leaving and at the same time, super sad. 

But I’m leaving my boss tomorrow! 

Thank you God. For a successful completion. Because it will be successful. I did not steal, did not cheat, I was above board in everything I did. And I can’t wait to pack all my stuff and go buy shawarma. 

Thank God for me peoples! Praise God for me.

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Author’s Note- I’m sorry if this offends anyone’s sensibilities, but what the heck is wrong with Trump? What? 

And Bubu, I get that you have laser vision for stamping out corruption and while the DSS’ actions are legal, why now? And, what are you trying to distract us from?

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Birthday Edition Wattpad Recommendations

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Laura Jardine’s books- The Mechanic’s New Girl especially and all the others too. Really short books. I beg you, na beg I dey beg una, make una no read any book by this author anywhere people go dey look una. 

She funny well well. You go laugh. For me it’s not a problem, laughter is an integral part of my personality. I’m quirky, happy and lovable. That’s my “brand”, those are my characteristics. 

Take me Home- Blissom. Wow. This book was insanely good, I forced my eyes open all night to finish reading it. Wow!

Cell Phone Swap- Lindsay Summers/donotmicrowave.

 I’m making a sandwich. Two funny books at the edges and a serious one as the middle. This book is so funny, I crilaughed. It’s funny but it addresses some serious issues. I really, really, really can’t recommend this book enough.

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Birthday Article Recommendations πŸ˜‰ (yes I know I’m milking it. Don’t be jelly *tongue in*)

http://chynanu.wordpress.com/2016/01/09/fear-will-always-fade/ – Evergreen.

http://www.sabinews.com/no-i-not-suffering-child-tope-owolabi/- Precisely.

http://brittneyamoses.com/i-dont-know-what-to-read-in-the-bible/- So simple, it’s thought provoking.

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​Of old friends, newly minted acquaintances and LASTMA

        About 2 weeks back, Nedoux called to invite me for an event. As I had nothing else to do on that day, and I’d been on the lookout for an opportunity to go to the island to meet up with some old friends, I accepted.
I’m not going to gush too much but the parts I stayed for were so so lovely. I met up with my friends too. But the highlight of the day for me were the people I met and the snacks I ate. The gifts as well and I got to see my friends. So, pretty much the whole day made it on the highlight reel.

A huge shoutout must go to the following people-

Chinedu “Nedoux” Ahanonu- amazing blogger, kind of big sister, generally fun human being. Thanks for inviting me.

Tosin Alabi –  Nice person. Friendly too. I unilaterally banned her from answering any more questions during the trivia game, cos she kept on getting em right. Still, the bag and the slippers were very very well deserved.

Adaeze – Was a classic case of don’t judge a blogger by the preconceived notion you’ve had of them. I always pictured her as demure and quiet. She is not. At all. She made me laugh more than once and I loved her outfit for the day, especially her bag, purse more like, that was so dainty and tiny, I’m surprised it was functional. And white trousers too. Really awesome sense of style. Great writer. Thanks for my necklace by the way.

Chinelo – Didn’t interact too much with her but she seemed nice.

Uzoma – Nice lady. Bit quiet, awesome with the camera. 

Amaka – We already met. Her blog is quite amazing, check it out for thrifty ideas.
Ogo- Stylist. Super friendly. She had on this satiny white shirt and a wide legged pant with slits on. I’m not much for wide legged pants, but i think I may duplicate it at some point.
Yanmife, Ifemide and Ibukun- Yanmife had that mischievous vibe going for him. The Uju part of my personality likes mischievous people. Ifemide was quiet and helpful. He got along great with the Obi part of me. Ibukun and I didn’t interact very much but he seemed nice enough.

Also, my inner fan girl was freaking out. I met Afrolems in the flesh! Awesome human being by the way. We share a mutual dislike of avocados. The only difference being that she’s gotten over her dislike enough to incorporate it in recipes and I; still hate the smell.

The food and drinks:

Cafe Neo’s pineapple and ginger juice is the bomb.com. It’s quite amazing. 
My friend also bought Bailey’s chin chin at Cafe Neo and I tasted it. Very nice, great idea.

12 baskets did not disappoint with their small chops. I especially liked the peppery spring rolls.

Wilson’s Lemonade was completely on point, as always.

My brother adored SoYummy’s caramel popcorn. I liked it too even though I don’t really like caramel.

Afrolems’ gizdodo was so amazingly tender! And a work of art, presentation wise.

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I facilitated a 3 way swap for this necklace. Worth it.

I can’t wait to use this!
Check Yes, LASTMA. Thanks Chinedu!

P.s- Follow my blog with Bloglovin’  <a href=”http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/12992093/?claim=fwfsvbt4vwm”>Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

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Article Recommendation

http://loudthoughtsvoicedout.wordpress.com/2016/09/11/dear-15-year-old-me/