I kept a pen for 6 years and other short stories

I kept a pen for six years…

I have a fascination with unusual pens, whether their unusualness is color related, the place I got it from or the shape. I have a pen shaped like a toy car. And basically everything most people lose often, I have a tendency to keep for ages. Bobby pins; I’ve had my current pair for 3 years. Hair bands, nail cutters, hair decorations, there are some in my room that my mom has threatened to toss out. They’ve been with me for a long long long while. Think 11 years and above.

The point, a colleague of mine received a green pen from a customer and after a while, she forgot it at home. Now I had a green pen too. So we were hanging out after work and she mentioned that I’d taken her green pen. Lol. I then fully explained all the differences between my green pen and her green pen and then I ended with the statement, “Don’t test me oh, I’ve kept one pen for 6 years before.” I had indeed, from age 12 – 18 only ending once my pen bag was filched, probably because of the N1000 I’d taken to keeping there. But as a lesson to everyone who has a pen similar to mine, “do not test me oh, I’ve kept pens for 6 years” and not for lack of usage too. ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘ I’m clapping for myself.

DiCS personality testing

So in one of my bank’s training sessions, the facilitator had a breakdown of this personality test and she explained that dominant personality types are drivers, result oriented people who don’t particularly care if they hurt your feelings, how they look etc etc. I know some dominant people. Influential people are the kind who care, who’ll take the time to explain why while making you feel like the choice is completely yours but you’d definitely want to do as they say because you see the benefits. And then she explained C and S. Cautious/conscientious (prone to reading everything before signing or agreeing (I’ve read the terms and conditions of quite a few online agreements, think 60 pages of small print), have unbreakable, sometimes unreasonable routines, conscientious people really really don’t want problems and they look for lots of ways to not get in trouble; and Steadiness. I was listening to the personality traits she described and I was like, Uju, this is so you. And then she said, everyone has little bits of all these personalities but the difference is the ones they exhibit constantly. Imagine someone being a C and an S in one body. Basically me. Chai. Chim o. I almost burst into nervous laughter. I’m a bloody hero guys. I’m a super hero. I’ll sign autographs for you as long as you feed me for an entire day day. And I eat, a lot. ๐Ÿ˜Š

P. S- I have absolutely no idea why the I is always in non capital. I completely forgot what the opposite of capital letters is. I just remembered, it is Small letters.

John Oliver- Last week tonight

Please take some time out to watch this show. It’s crazy funny and very very informative. See,

This is my rule, ignore it

I wrote on a previous post, that I’d stop reading blog posts if the blogger didn’t reply comments I’d left on their posts. So here’s an amendment and an apology; shit happens. I realize that lots of people have commitments to more than just me and I’m cool with that. I don’t like it at all. But if I like a blog and leave a comment and I’m not replied to, I’m cool. It’s very peaceful not caring too much about crap like that.

Jevinik Place: A review

Went out with a friend today. I suggested Jevinik and he agreed. I had to be at work by 7am and we were to meet by 2. So I was quite hungry by then. Remember, I like food and Jevinik is known for its huge portions.

I ordered Abacha and my friend ordered pounded yam and vegetable soup. And then I ordered Nkwobi to go.

Things to note, you had to order your sides separately. Basically, my friend had to order goat meat separately. My Abacha was good. I had to answer questions about Abacha and what it was and by the time I was done, I was exhausted. Also, my abacha came with zero “encouragement”, zero “motivation”. I had to pick out my friend’s dry fish and munch. I didn’t know you had to order sides separately.

P.s: I didn’t know I was going to do this review until halfway through my food. So there are no full pictures. Sorry.

Then there was the bottle of water we did not ask for which the waiter gave us. A confused order perhaps. But still. I’d ordered the abacha as a starter but in the end, it was starter, main course and dessert. I have a tendency to overestimate my appetite. Adaeze can tell you. We had fresh juice, as the waiter called it. He did not make a distinction as to what the fruit was but, come close ๐Ÿ˜ณ it was pineapple juice with lots of foam. You’re welcome. The prices were fair, except I just noticed that the price of the goat meat was more than the price of the soup. Lol.

img_20180630_2243501249439950.jpg

Everything considered, including the 10 minute power outage, I give the place a 3.5/5 star rating.

P. S- Thank you so much dear for being the kind of person whose food I can grab and chew without shame. Thank you for the long ass walking tour and everything else.

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JILL MOMENTS (2) – ABACHAย 

I need Vivian’s attention here please! Thank you.
Since 5 people died in Lagos of cholera caused by eating abacha, I haven’t wanted to eat it outside. But sometimes the craving got so bad. Lucky for me, without me asking, one of my aunts came over and she brought 3 huge bags of abacha for the house.  

And I was all happy.

The truth is, making abacha is incredibly simple. I’ll explain it to you in 7 easy steps. 

Total time for prepping and “cooking” is 20 minutes.

But first; What you’ll need– 

  • Abacha (buy the N100 in the market if it’s only for you)
  • Ground Crayfish (optional)
  • Pepper.
  • Ehuru (calabash nutmeg); ground
  • Onions, sliced.
  • Ugba/ukpaka
  • 1 stock cube
  • Sliced ugu/anara/waterleaf/tete. Most people think only anara leaves go with abacha. Wrong. Any green leaf goes with it.(optional)
  • Fish/Kpomo/Meat (optional)
  • Potash/akaun
  • A bowl of hot water
  • Palm oil.

The How-to

Step 1: Wash your abacha. Wash it very well to get rid of the dirt etc. Then soak it in the bowl of hot water.This will soften it and bring out that abacha smell. If you’re using ugba, just wash it properly. Ugba is oil bean seed and shouldn’t be in hot water for too long.

Step 2: While your abacha is soaking, it’s time to make your “ncha” (the palm oil sauce used for abacha). First, break off a small piece of potash. It’s commonly sold in a small, rock-like form.
Step 3: Grind that small piece of potash into fine powder. Then melt it. Use 3 tablespoonfuls of water to melt. The water does not need to be hot.

Step 4: Add in the palm oil to the potash and water mix. You don’t want to have too much palm oil. For a small bowl of abacha, 2 teaspoons of palm oil should be more than enough. It will begin to change color from palm oil red to yellow. Mix thoroughly.
Step 5: Add in your crayfish, ground ehuru, stock cube. Many don’t add in their onions and pepper to the abacha until the very end but I like to add it in here. Adjust for taste. Mix thoroughly.
Step 6: Sieve your abacha until all the water is gone. You don’t want watery abacha now, do you?

Best to pour the ncha over the abacha as it’s smaller in size

Step 7: Pour the ncha over the abacha. Mix thoroughly until every grain of abacha is coated with palm oil. Add in your sliced vegetables, mix again, then top it with your fish or meat.

Enjoy!

ARTICLE RECOMMENDATIONS 

http://thenakedconvos.com/15-steps-will-lead-seizing-potential-bae-nigerian-wedding/- this post is definitely Lol.

http://speakingdnd.wordpress.com/2016/10/11/dear-teen-its-okay-not-to-be-considered-beautiful/

WATTPAD RECOMMENDATIONS

Fraternizing with the Enemy- hyrule. What can I say, I love the stereotyped angry teenage characters. This was super nice. The A/Ns were quite awesome as well. 

Bridesmaid Lotto- Rachelastor. “McMaster the Disaster”. Awesome story.

Wedding Playlist Suggestions 4

This happens to be one of the songs recommended to me on social media by @bbogaard. 

He suggested two more though- I got a feeling (by the Black Eyed Peas, I think) and Time of Our Lives (I presume from Dirty Dancing/Tyrone Wells) .

The lyrics of the songs are the biggest portion of what I look for in a song I want to recommend, especially one that will presumably be heard over speakers at my wedding. And I got a feeling talks about tonight. I get that this is a wedding playlist and the wedding typically lasts for only a day. But if you look at all the previous wedding playlist suggestions, you’ll find that they all have lyrics that speak into the future. Nevertheless, I love that song. Let me consider it first.

But I will not be doing a post on the Tyrone Wells version of Time of Our Lives. Lyrics are about saying goodbye. Not what I want at all. The Jennifer Grey version though has definite possibilities. I will more than likely be doing a post on it soon.

Right now however, the honor of making it to the 4th suggestion of my wedding playlist goes to Can’t Fight this Feeling by Reo Speedwagon.

“Can’t Fight This Feeling”

I can’t fight this feeling any longer
And yet I’m still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship, has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show
I tell myself that I can’t hold out forever
I said there is no reason for my fear
Cause I feel so secure when we’re together
You give my life direction
You make everything so clear

And even as I wander
I’m keeping you in sight
You’re a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winter’s night
And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can’t fight this feeling anymore
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for
It’s time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever

Cause I can’t fight this feeling anymore
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crashing through your door
Baby, I can’t fight this feeling anymore

My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw you
I’ve been running round in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I’m following you, girl
Cause you take me to the places that alone I’d never find

And even as I wander I’m keeping you in sight
You’re a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter’s night
And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can’t fight this feeling anymore
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for
It’s time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever

Cause I can’t fight this feeling anymore
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crashing through your door
Baby, I can’t fight this feeling anymore.

*

Lyrics culled from http://www.azlyrics.com.

Edited by me, Obianuju Ayalogu.

Thanks to a Twitter Suggestion by @ bbogaard.

Thanks for reading. By the way, feel free to follow him or me at @hrhobj.

By the way, the first article recommendation is very important. please whenever you can find the time, read it? Thank you.

 

Article Recommendations 

 

  • http://ihundasmusings.com/2016/08/22/recipe-home-made-ice-cream/ – A friend recently claimed I wasn’t a foodie. And I was like, ๐Ÿ˜’ do you even know me at all? I love food biko. I just don’t like taking pictures and posting on social media about food.Might make someone growl from hunger. But I am a foodie. And I do have a massive sweet tooth. So head on over to learn how to make cookies and cream ice cream.

 

JILL MOMENTS(1)- ๐ŸŒ bread

I am not yet a master of any trade (I think) but I am a Jill of some. And it occurred to me a while ago, why don’t I show you about some of my Jill moments?

Today, I’ll show you how to make a low carb version of banana bread using @9jafoodie’s recipe.

Banana bread is one of my favorite snack/sweet indulgences of all time. I made it myself at age 18 and 19 and you get the point. 

And while I can make it without using anyone’s recipe, I’ve always hated taking someone’s ideas and using them without giving credit where it is due. Even in a field as saturated as recipes, a field where all recipes are basically the same, but with a few tweaks, those few tweaks deserve to be mentioned.
I made this on Monday for my aunt who was staying over and who celebrated her birthday on that day. I fudged a bit on the recipe but she and another aunt liked it so much.

What you’ll need:

Dry Ingredients

1/4 cup of granulated sugar (brown or white. I’ve only ever used white and I didn’t use sugar in this recipe.)

A pinch of salt.

1.5 cups of flour.

A teaspoon of baking soda (read here on the difference)

A teaspoon of baking powder. (Tip: Depends on whether the baking powder you use is very active or not. The primary function of baking powder is to lift your batter. If you know that the brand you use doesn’t lift it properly, add in about 3 more tablespoons, not teaspoons.)

1/2 Chopped pistachio nuts (optional – 9jafoodie’s tweak)

Wet Ingredients

3 overripe bananas. (I used 5)

1/4 cup of coconut oil. (Tip: Or canola. Don’t use olive oil though. I find that olive oil goes lots better with pasta dishes and not so great with baked stuff

1/2 a tin of condensed/evaporated milk

1/2 a cup of melted butter (use a measuring cup. If you can’t find a measuring cup, use the same sized cup for all your measurements)

2 eggs

How to:

  1. Preheat oven.
  2. Sieve and mix all the dry ingredients with each other, except for the chopped nuts. Set aside.
  3. Mash your bananas. All the little bits of banana, mash it up until it makes a smooth paste with no lumps.
  4. Add in the eggs (Tip: break the eggs in another bowl and beat the eggs so they capture more air).
  5. Add in the milk and melted butter.
  6. Mix all wet ingredients with each other in a bowl.Stir.

6. Now, mix all the dry ingredients with the wet ingredients, making sure not to overmix your batter.

7. Pour batter into a greased cake/loaf tin. Add in the chopped nuts.

8. Bake for about 1 hour, 15 minutes or you can do the toothpick test instead (when you think your banana bread is done, insert a toothpick in it. If it comes out clean, your banana bread is ready to be taken out of the oven. If it comes out with some batter on it, leave it in)

9. Enjoy!

NB- I did not add sugar, chopped nuts or melted butter to mine. Bananas are extremely sweet on their own and I used 5 instead of 3. So I figured it evened out. The melted butter was to keep the banana bread moist but I figured the milk and the coconut oil did that adequately. And I was right. 

This is a basic template for banana bread. If you want, add in chocolate chips, peanut butter, raisins.. You can do whatever you want. Just know what each ingredient is supposed to do in a recipe and play around with it.

My mom used to pour in so much baking powder. Now I know why. It didn’t rise very much.

If you make banana bread soon using this recipe, tag me on Twitter or Instagram @hrhobj.

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