This post should have been published on Wednesday…

22 things you (probably) don’t know about me:

1. I’m gorgeous- I just discovered it this year and since then, I’ve been basking in my own gorgeousness.
And, I’ll tell you this, being happy and basking in it, draws whatever you want toward you. #Feelingmyself 😄

2. I don’t know how to swim: (yet). I could have learned a couple of times but eh, I refuse to wear second hand bathing suits and I’m too shy to wear a 2 piece.

3. I don’t have a crush on any celebrity. I have crushes on (body) parts of celebrities. That is, if you excised Tuface’s voice and mixed it with Enrique Iglesias’, added Chris Evans’ biceps etc. There’s a post on this phenomenon.

4. I have about 5000 songs on my laptop, almost a thousand on my phone.Β 75% Christian but I adore rock music. I’ve made many a roommate stare in shock when I started head banging. They all met Obi first, I guess.

5. I like to try out new recipes. The-you- probably-shouldn’t-be-doing-that kind of recipes. Sprite in my eggs, yam cakes with sweetcorn etc. Now, I’m sure they are not that wild but having my brothers tell me they’d rather eat the original multiple times has reinforced the illusion that I’m forging new culinary paths. Indulge me.

6. Texts>>>>>> Calls. Except in emergency situations or special occasions. ‘Nuff said.

7. My favourite colours are Yellow, black and grey. Red though is definitely edging all the more into my consciousness.

8. I just found out that I’m 5’6. You can’t imagine my joy! Background- I’ve always wanted to be a tall girl. And for the last 2 years, I’ve been under the delusion that I was 5’4. And now, I’m so happy. You might not understand my joy but I come from a family and 2 extended families of tall people and I have been teased. My big brother used to tell me this height was my last bus stop. I’ve been feeling like a short girl for years but God heard my cries. He looked down on me and revealed my extra 2 inches. Lift your hands and praise Him. Lift those hands and thank Him. He is worthy of our praise.

9. I sneeze perpetually. I’m sure it’s caused by allergies but what am I allergic to? I don’t know. I suspect wheat flour but I’m not sure. And wheat flour is in pretty much everything, especially my beloved Beloxxi crackers and Shortbread biscuits. I once took a break from anything with it but I still had the blocked, sneezy nose. It doesn’t affect anything much. I just have to remember to take a hankie (or 2) everywhere I go.

10. Surprisingly, I also happen to have a heightened sense of smell. Smoke, dead rats, perfume (excess), I can immediately smell. It’s a bittersweet blessing because on the one hand, no rats can stink up my room and I know when to wash my clothes and, on the other, secondhand smoke, excess perfume (an ex roommate was guilty of this) had the ability to give me massive headaches or block my nose even further.

11. Once, when the insomnia/delayed sleep disorder prevented me from drifting off, I I decided to stay up. I stayed up for 2 days that first time. 3 the next time. It had no adverse effect or so I thought. Until the day my body hibernated. I was in class, the stage in fact (crowded classroom) when suddenly I couldn’t move my legs. Then my arms. Then my head felt like I was carrying a ton of bricks so I laid it down. I was still alert but I couldn’t move from that position. Even when the lecture ended, I couldn’t move. Scared the shit out of me, I tell you. The minute I regained motor function, I went back to my hostel and laid down. And that was how my battle with sleep ended. I still stay up some nights but I never let it get so long my brain overrides my will. And I take naps. Lots of them. Please pray for me. I need to get my body on a regular sleep pattern again.

12. I don’t eat swallows. Well, except pounded/poundo yam and semovita with ofe nsala. Everything else, :(.

13. Water, water and more water. I do not appreciate dehydration, thank you very much.

14. I have never fainted. The day I unleashed Anu on a roommate (2 hours of concentrated rage), I wished I would faint. The time I got dizzy and vomited in GTBank, I wished I would faint. But still, I have not.

15. In all the time I’ve been taking sewing lessons, I haven’t made anything for myself yet.

16. I like short hair. Since I went natural, my hair has been trying to sprout wings and fly down my back but I just be snipping it short.

17. I hate most salons. So I keep getting hair care tools that will enable me to take care of my hair myself.

18. I used to be really OCD. “Don’t touch my stuff. Put it back exactly where you saw it. Not there, that end by the shelf. Aargh, I’ll just do it myself”.
These days I don’t even care. I suppose that’s progress.

19. I like jewelry. I hardly wear my jewelry. Therefore I no longer buy jewelry.

20. I really like walking. Once I walked so far, I found myself in another estate and had to get directions.

21. And running. In my last year of university, I used to run 3 nights a week. Had to stop because-
a) when you’re running and some people see you, they start running after you. Had a conversation with one such person, he’d just entered university, was drinking (alcohol) in a group, and when they saw me running, they sent him after me.
b). Some dudes would start singing to me, or attempt to use the cloak of night to toast me.
c) Once or twice, some hediots would set leg for me to trip over.
I got the message. I stopped running.

22. I became a year older this last Wednesday (7/10). Did not feel my birthday at all but still:

image

image

2 cakes, pizza, ice cream.
All finished.

Want to guess how old I turned?
*********************************

http://chynanu.wordpress.com/2015/03/12/my-virginity-is-not-my-pride/

SUPER DUPER HIGHLY RECOMMENDED:
http://willifmoore.com/2015/02/12/being-black-this-post-may-cause-offense/

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27 thoughts on “This post should have been published on Wednesday…

    1. The OCD, it was driving people nuts.i don’t even know what prompted me to stop but whatever it is, I’m thankful.
      Thank you sweerie!

  1. Hahahahaha
    Girl you got me laughing like crazy.
    I was controlling it until the part where people see u running and run after u. I burst into uncontrollable lafta my son joined me. I am still laughing….

    1. It was so funny the day it happened. I laughed well because I didn’t want to be scared. We actually had a nice conversation but that was just him. And truly, I like being in possession of all the variables.So, I just had to stop before the handshake would pass the elbow. Thanks for comment n0. 1.

  2. Maybe cos I also went for a walk today and I had quite an ‘interesting’ time myself from toasters. Looooooool.
    Happy belated birthday darling.

    Looooooool

    1. These days no one is protected oh. at least these ones give you a choice.Some others will not.
      How was your walk? How is KingDaveed?
      Thank you!

      1. My walk was good jare. Was on the phone the entire hour so I wasn’t bothered. Now even if I wasn’t, I still wouldn’t be bothered. πŸ™‚
        KingDaveed is amazing thanks

  3. Hi dear,

    Witty as always, lol

    Ah! the realisation of one’s own gorgeousness is the beginning of self-love.

    Though I have a swim-suit that offers decent coverage, I haven’t quite conquered the fear of drowning, and so I can’t swim. I wish I could though. I’m content with flapping about in the pool for now.

    Not to worry, with more practise, you’ll start to sew many things for yourself soon.

    People impulsively running after people who are running intentionally really cracked me up. XD

    Uju, the way you used the term “hibernation” to describe that incident made me chuckle. I recall you mentioned your insomnia in a previous post. Ndo.

    Your birthday cakes looked so yummy! I wish you the best of God’s blessings as you’ve entered a new year of life. I wish you happiness now and always.

      1. Right on the button, you are. My little brother still calls me little sis though so I guess some things will not be changing anytime soon. 😊
        I do wish I could share the cake, pizza and ice cream with everyone so, because I’m a doer: 🍰 πŸ• 🍦.
        I hope you enjoy it! πŸ˜„

    1. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
      You have a touch of hydrophobia? Glad to know you have flaws too. I have actually sewn quite a lot of things for quite a lot of people, my issue with making something for myself is that I have too many clothes already. If I do sew something for myself though, it will likely be a maxi dress or a jumpsuit or a print top, nothing I have).
      The hibernation thing, it really was scarily similar. I could function, I could hear, although dully but I couldn’t move. At all. It was like I had no limbs. I thank God that it was my last class though and that the teacher didn’t say a word about my “sleeping” directly behind him.
      My birthday cakes, thank you oh. I wasn’t going to get anything but the people in my house were like, no way so…
      Thank you for the well wishes…

  4. And that is how i almost missed your birthday. Is that you have turned a year older or you have? Happy birthday in arrears and presently your royal higherness :p

  5. Awwww! What is even *paining* πŸ˜‰ is that i missed ur cake and i couldnt send my gifts.
    Maybe you could help arrange somehow. I am cake freak and your gift? You can ask to the half of my kingdom

    1. Sure. House address for me to send the cake. And in return, I want a perfume gift set, a diamond crown and 10 million dollars. 😝

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