22 Ifeoluwa

I love you Ife. I do. I love you so much I’m going to say how much. In numbered detail.

So, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways:

1. I love you because you dragged me to JESUS. You saw a dying spark, and you puffed and fanned on the spark till it became a flame. It is a roaring flame now.

2. I love you because you are reasonably happy. You know how I dislike constant complaining. And through everything in your life, you’ve stayed reasonably happy. And taught me how to do and be the same too.

3. I love you because you teach me something new every time I see you.  It doesn’t have to be a vocal lesson. You’ve taught me attitude lessons, prayer lessons, Bible lessons, every possible type of lesson.

4. I love you because you are one of the very few people who has NEVER CALLED ME GAY (Aside: I like people, I like holding them sometimes and when they are my friends, all the time. Dear people, GET OVER IT! I AM NOT GAY! I DO NOT HAVE ANY HOMOSEXUAL LEANINGS. And if I dress like a boy and forget to put on my “I’m such a pretty girl, look at me” face sometimes, please never make the mistake of calling me gay. To my face or anywhere else. It’s been years since I drop- kicked anyone. Do NOT annoy me down that path again)

5. I love you because you are practically the only person who calls me the day after my birthday to find out how I feel about how it went.

6. I love you because I have not been able to make you afraid. Of me or for my sanity. And I tried. Oh how I have tried. I think I still do sometimes.

7. I love you because you operate as a check on my exuberance, a spark when I’m down and peace when I’m pissed.

8. I love you because you apologised to me. When I yelled. At you. Till date, I’m certain that GOD would have slapped me upside my head had I not apologised to you immediately afterwards. That still surprises me. Even to this day.

9. I love you because you correct me without making me feel stupid.

10. I love you because I (try to) see the best in other people because you searched for the best in me when I didn’t think I had any to show.

11. I love you because you taught me that friendship is never just about me.

12. I love you because you are coded. Even I, with my years of practice, am not as coded as you are. But baby, trust that I’m proud of that in you.

13. I love you because you are not jealous of my time.  Or of my attention. If I have ignored you, you take it in your stride and never complain. Yet you never ignore me out of revenge. You are the sweetest person. I just wanted you to know that.

14. I love you because I met Joy because of you. It took longer than it had to. Too busy spreading this awesomeness around you know. But I love her. She is even happier than you! *gasp*.

15. I love you because you have loved me. Abundantly. Over abundantly. You have loved me through my prissiness, through my irritations, through my fears and through my failures. You loved and cared about me the whole time. You love me every time. When I can’t stop crying. When I am so enraged I’m kicking chairs and tables, when I’m cussing like sailors originally became known for. When I am sick and infected. When I’m depressed and unhappy. You’ve loved me through all of that and never said a word in complaint. Only in comfort.

16. I love you for your interest in everything. In life, in the spectacular. In everything. DO NOT LOSE THAT INTEREST HONEY. IT STANDS YOU OUT.

17. I love you because you actually care about my blog.

18. I love you because anytime I have had roommate drama you’ve taken the case up to GOD for and with me.

19. I love you because you never tried to understand me before you made the decision to love me.

20. I love you because though you sometimes don’t understand why I am who I am or why I do the things I do, you adore me for every step I take in the right direction anyway.

21. I love you because though I call you “baby”, I think of you more as mommy.

22. I love you because you CELEBRATE me. You have celebrated me so much over the years that I have had no excuse for being less than all I can be, all that GOD created me to be.

You bring the best out of me every time. And you love me even when I’m being too stubborn to give you that best. The question should not be: How do I love you? The question should be: How could I NOT love you? Who would not love you? You are awesome.  You are spectacular. You are Ifeoluwa E. Ayinoluwa. Your mother’s birthday present. God’s present to me. You are smart. You are kind. You are an addition, never a subtraction. A multiplication, never a division. And you are wonderful.


Happy birthday Sweetheart!


19 thoughts on “22 Ifeoluwa

  1. Reblogged this on THE WAY I SEE IT… and commented:
    I cannot but term this divine. Face it, dear writer…you have been touched by an angel.

    I think I am not one to keep human friends. I think I have a big problem mentally and emotionally…suffering betrayal too many times from people you call friends and loved ones can do that to you. And the way I am, I forgive easily but I avoid getting hurt again, meaning I barely forget. It keeps ringing in my head. I run, and I run in such a manner that the person in running from will move from being sorry, to disgust, and then maybe absolute hatred. Apparently, when I run, I leave all feelings behind. Anyway, its just what i think.

    I know that the only feeling (and I know it is beyond feeling) I have been able to sustain for the past three years is my love for Jesus. No other…and I am aware that Jesus has more than an emotional hold on me. I’m the one who hurts Jesus and I try to run from him. But he never lets go of me. I still pray for that kind of attitude. I pray to get beyond all the hurt and pain and allow people in once again. But I must confess I’m not in a rush, because I’m too satisfied with Jesus.

    My issues nonetheless, I admire those who have succeeded in such a venture as I have woefully failed in. I believe that friends like that do not operate in a human dimension at all. They experience a paradigm shift and turn human sense right on its head. The love then begins to bother on the absurd and people ask silly questions like “are they gay?”.

    I read this piece and I almost concluded, were it not for the “happy birthday” I read, that Ife died during the night! It is that good. I mean, if you’re really young and someone writes this about you, and its not at your burial, then you certainly have a great life ahead. I ought to behave better I guess, ‘cos I’m 22 and no one is close to writing any such thing about me. Father, You need to change my story ASAP.

    I admire this Omoge. Its simple. I think it takes great courage to identify yourself and admit your true self to yourself. You have never for a day tried to hide your person and where your person does not meet society’s demands, you have created a new society. I belong in that society now. I had to endure my friends teasing me back in past tense just because a certain girl who didn’t “fit in” was my friend. I didn’t care. I liked it everytime she called me Máfolábòmí a gentle pat on the back not far behind. I still like the fact that she didn’t smile at every joke and she isn’t attracted by the look of things, just the substance of things. And she taught me to question the state of things. With her, being different became fashionable. I just cannot begin to tell how much your little became so much for me. I love you greatly and I think you are a friend to be admired and cherished, even with all your confessed “faults”.

    My first conversation with Ife was on a Wednesday night some time ago in 2011. She was genuinely surprised that I was a fellowship executive member and she could not hide her surprise. She made a very very very blunt remark about how “anyone” could be an executive member of my fellowship. Jesus Christ, I didn’t even know I had such a bad reputation. Later on my bed in Jaja, I assessed my life and with the direction I found my safe facing, I knew that I was wasting away. In fact, I was really so certain that my fellowship, as liberal as they were, wouldn’t return me as a member let alone an executive one. I made a decision not to be just anyone. I wanted to meet Ife another night and make sure she would see a man living right with God (or at least making the best effort to do so). That one statement from Ife was like a cataclysmic event; I found God (though He was never lost). I don’t know how or why, but I cannot say it wasn’t because you made me realize that much better was expected of me.

    Today,I am grateful to God for Ife and her mouth that can never hold back truth. Thank you Ife. It pinched a lot, but you helped me. You’re still gonna help a lot of people in life and I pray that you get more than enough supply of grace to meet the demand.

    Happy birthday

    1. I think I have a friend just like you. I stopped talking to her a while back. I was tired of forcing myself to be her friend. She seems sooo coiled up inside, lies about her private life, does everything she can to prevent closeness and all the while I thought we were friends.
      I was irritated at first and later pissed off. She’s my colleague at work and now we rarely talk because I used to do all the talking.
      I felt if she wasn’t ready to deal with her ‘friendship challenges’ then I’m not ready to be her friend either because she just ignores me all the time.
      But now that you’ve given me a glimpse into her world, I will try being a friend again, just maybe she’ll loosen up a tad bit.

      1. I know the frustration of that! I have another friend just like you described. By the way, it’s always better to exhaust all options before giving up, especially as it’s so hard to find good friends these days.
        I’ll be praying about the situation. GOD bless you!

  2. Hmnh… that’s how this blogger n Maphorbs made me cry. I hope heaven is saying something better about me or even close. Thanks for being a great friend Uju. I pray we all fulfil the purpose of God for our lives.

  3. Awwwww. My personal Crocka! Ife yen! Pawpaw! Omo Mi first born. You apparently are to a lot of people what you are to me. GOD bless you Ife! May GOD’s angels continue to radiate Heaven’s awesomeness around you. I love you like that. :* Kisses olova MFM geh! :*

  4. the choice of words is beautiful but what’s more beautiful is the personality of the subject matter of this piece. and to be sincere, I cannot relate with everything written up there but I have experienced some and I can confidently say that they are concise.
    thumbs Uju, thumbs up!

  5. 19 is so deep. It tells us of who we are to be to people around us. It tells of how Christ loves us. Never about us is the reason He’s loved (and loves) us, always and only about Him.

    Ife, for someone to write this about you, it does mean you’re a wonderful person. I just want to wish you a Happy birthday and a most fulfilling year ahead, filled with unending joys, immeasurable love and absolute peace.

    Uju, I see I met the fine tuned person eh? Good for you, and this is a beautiful expression of love…

    Cheers (y)

  6. My tym with Ife was a short one but truth be told twas a beautiful tym knowing her and her beautiful smile (fish of lyf). May God continually kip n bless u dearie and may ur smile dat kips putting smiles on others’ faces neva fade away. Love n kisses dearie!

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